Bones: with time I will mend this fracture stronger then ever. You were wise to put your faith in me.
Teeth: auuggh pleeasseee get this granule of sugar awaaayy from meee I am MELTING and BURNING nnnNNOOO you are cleaning me TOO HARD;! aaaiughh my fucking enamellll one billion cavities for you!!! Your sins against me are PERMANENT you SICK BITCH
You ever think about how weird hippos are ecologically speaking?
There’s literally no other megafauna on earth that spends the entire day lounging around in water, mostly just socializing, only to come onto land to feed at night.
I remember when I used to do education programs on hippos, most people assumed they ate aquatic plants, and that that’s the whole reason they were in water. Meanwhile, hippos are basically just giant nocturnal cows that eat only grass.
most animals that start adapting to live more of their lives in water:
“i must grow my bones lighter and less dense so that i don’t get trapped on the bottom and may float easier in this new environment”
hippos: “denser. heavier bones. MOAR dense. Make sink the most.”
mother nature: but how will you get off the bottom when you sink?
hippos: Make muscles more too, give all muscle.
mother nature: and to stay warm in the water? a big layer of fat?
hippos: no! no fat only muscle.
mother nature: o….kay. And, you eat aquatic plants, that’s why you spend so much time in the water?
hippos: lol no. eat land grass, like cow.
mother nature: i see. right. You eat mostly grass, so, flat grinding teeth?
hippos: hell no. big spike teeth. sharp big teeth. Biggest
mother nature: what, like lions? 3 inch fangs?
hippos: course not. giant fuck-off teeth, 18 inches. Also, not just one pair, three pairs of giant sharp teeth. give
mother nature: but you eat… grass?
hippos: yeah. lol. Sometimes eat a zebra tho. Or a antelope. Maybe eat a crocodile, you don’t know. Give all teeth, giant fuck-off teeth. Most bone! most muscle! most teeth! Me.
mother nature: y'know what? fuck it, sure, here you go
hippo: …
hippo: i’m very angry now
so idk about layers, and they are not all the same size, but they have three pairs of large sharp teeth on each side of their mouth, or you could say six pairs of …? anyway they have a bunch of molars you can barely see through the gums, and then they have these teeth:
looks like this in the mouth
so those are their, yeah i guess actually six pair of giant fuck-off teeth
The best thing about new zealand english is we get to pick and choose what we like from american english and british english.
The bad thing is that sometimes we choose wrong.
Like. Americans have fries and chips vs brits have chips and crisps. Both valid.
Here? We have chips and chips.
Youd think it’d be fine and that you can figure out which one a person is talking about from context but trust me a good percentage of the time you cannot. And often the person will try to differentiate them by clarifying they meant “Potato chips” only for them to realise a second later that both chips are made from potatoes
I shouldn’t make fun but that last part is DEEPLY hilarious to me
